Fun Run!
I want to give a special thank you to my wife for planting the thought of writing this entry. While taking a photo of the kids and I at the finish line at Manahawkin Lake for the Stafford Race for Hope sprint triathlon, she yelled out that I was going to put it in my jlog. Although I had no intention of doing it because it was just a fun run for me, she put it out in the universe. And the picture came out beautifully! I had to take accountability and proceeded to reflect over the month of June on that day and about the heat of marathon training that is now getting into high gear!
To start, for runners and spouses of runners, you know very well the difference between booking a family vacation and booking a marathon getaway! The fun of signing up for organized runs keeps this sport full of excitement for the entire family. Hours of research, intense phone calls, family schedules.. This is fresh in my mind as my wife and I and sister and her family think of creative ways to get into the 2025 London Marathon for a family trip over spring break next year. Yes, we are already booking out for next spring. We signed up for two separate tour operators, entered the lottery, booked a flight, for a trip that is 10 months away and we’re still panicking that we’re too late. I’m now in a stretch with no organized runs until the marathon in Chicago this October. So where would the fun be without booking trips for 2025 marathons? Booking the Stafford Race For Hope triathlon six months in advance with a few clicks, was an absolute pleasure! A triathlon, floating/swimming/paddling in Lake Manahawkin, tuning up my Fuji bike that went untouched for over five years and a mini getaway with the family for Father’s Day weekend was a good little twist to the intense marathon training.
From a fun run to now having a new challenge of learning how to swim since that part of the triathlon was a complete miss for me. It wasn’t much different twelve years ago in my very first triathlon. It was my very first endurance event as well! The cameras on iPhones apparently were not that good either. Leave it up to my wife who was taking photos even back then and always captures the moments! It was June 16, 2012 in Long Branch, NJ, almost exactly to the day when I completed the Stafford triathlon this go around and almost to the day of a more important anniversary for my wife and I, our wedding day on June 17, 2017. The first triathlon was especially memorable because it was just weeks before my father passed away. My father was a health enthusiast and a good swimmer himself. Much better than I am today! He would really appreciate seeing his children participating in events like this. He appreciated me doing the triathlon then. Unfortunately, he couldn’t be there due to his health, but I remember the phone call after the race when I spoke with him. It was a joyous moment and one of the last that I would share with him. As a father, he had expressed to me several times the importance of finishing whatever you start. That was a good day to say that I finished and for all of my endeavors now, I keep this important principle with me. I like the idea of making it a tradition on Father’s Day weekend to complete a triathlon in memory of him.
The difference is unimaginable between then and now. Sure, I was fit enough to get through the challenge and complete it at age 22, but at the time, I was the last one that anyone would bet on running marathons and competing for personal records. This month, I spent a day out in Long Island at a good friend from college’s house with his family and a few other friends. As we enjoyed good company, the topic of marathon running came up. We had a few good laughs remembering how I was the one who literally hitched a ride from one of them during one of my running challenges for soccer, up on Route 9 in Poughkeepsie, just so that I could pass my required time for spring training. Of course, I didn’t get away with that, like everything else that I conspired with during my college years. Not a proud moment, and one to learn from. So, here’s the guy that no one would have imagined being an endurance athlete. Just as Steve Jobs used to sing when he came up with a new product that nobody else could comprehend; ‘The Times, They Are A-Changin’… as the Bob Dylan song went. Times have certainly changed. On the theme of Father’s Day, having children transforms your entire world!
Change is hard, as spoken about in another Daily Stoic podcast episode with Professor Katy Milkman from The School of Wharton, about ‘commitment devices’. What are we using as a tool to help us approach change, stay committed to it, and to act beyond just being self-aware of our desired changes? In running, for me, it is running at a faster pace for a full marathon and finishing strong which I have yet to do in a marathon. This involves changing my lifestyle from training, to sleeping, to eating, to drinking and all energy exertion and consumption every single day. One of my commitment devices is this very jlog that I am writing! I am committed to growing every single day, every week, and in every way, running and living through the obstacles that exist in life. I can now look at everything in my environment as a commitment device to self-growth and self-improvement. Thinking that change will happen overnight will result in a dead end and it took practice to learn that. Change takes time and change is difficult. Ten years ago, I would have made the mistake of using my drive and will-power to convince myself that my identity was transformed into a ‘runner’ or some other small-minded theme. Now my commitment devices, my systems, my habits of growing every day both physically and mentally are what shape my identity.
The Daily Stoic podcast had some really good content this month. Specifically on physical health goals and training efforts. The Stoic art of physical training focused on listening to your body and managing injuries with post traumatic growth vs. post-traumatic stress. How we can come back from an injury stronger than before. It spoke about the Stoic virtues of acceptance and acquiescence. We accept a diagnosis, or a treatment given by a doctor because we don’t want to delay the cure, right? Don’t delay getting back on track and accept where you are with what you have to propel yourself forward at the right time, in the right way. Another great episode had renowned endurance athlete Rich Roll on. He spoke about the importance of self-awareness when we’re transforming to be the best version we can be of ourselves and building our behaviors around that. How to quietly chase your dreams and guard them. We can easily talk about them and be aware of them, however, are we taking the action necessary to achieve them? Are we making progress? They also went into how world leaders are more similar to us than different in the most human ways. We all face the ordinary obstacles of everyday life. It’s treating the ordinary in an extraordinary way that can differentiate us from the pack.
Another commitment device of mine is my running coach and training program through MTA that I’m already into my second month with. Training for this feat is about endurance and resiliency with high intensity and consistency. As I read the chapter on Will in The Obstacle Is The Way: Always remember to manage your expectations and submit to a greater cause. What I’m striving for is bigger than me. I’m one of many who have done it and it’s about challenging the inner self, my own limitations, and exceeding them in good health. Thoughtful planning in my time spent on daily tasks, sleep, eat, drink, and mileage is all necessary to do this right and get the most out of it. Love the process!
Here’s to June triathlons, family values, strong physical and mental health and to never stop growing. After all, I have a long way to go to learn how to properly swim! The only difference in this past triathlon from my first one twelve years ago was that I wasn’t being trailed the entire time by lifeguards. I just got the occasional, how are you doing over there and after a huge gasp for air, I’d yell out; OK!
The next one coming up will be in Staten Island and with family! It will be a fun one to recap our war stories on. Just remember that we signed up for it!
Lessons Learned:
The Wealthy Gardener: “Ambition is wasted on the irresolute since achievement demands endurance long after inspiration has fled. Fortitude is the character to finish what we start without self-pity.”
The Obstacle Is The Way:
The Art of Acquiescence. “The fates guide the person who accepts them and hinders the person who resists them.”
“Action requires courage, not brashness. Creative application and not brute force. Endurance, not resistance.”
“Simply do what you need to do right now. And do it well. And then move on to the next thing. Follow the process and not the prize.”
