The Brooklyn Way!

It has been a springtime of decision-making. It has also been the healthiest and the most physically active yet for our family. My wife is on a roll in her orange theory classes, scoring on the leaderboard consistently, as she and I run in and out of the house for my runs and her classes like a relay race! Our two sons are up now riding their bikes on two wheels and scored their first trophy from the Memorial Day 5K event!

The first major decision made for my running routine was immediately following the NYC Half. Right at this point was a good time to remember Sir Edmund Hillary on how to climb the next mountain. There was something more brewing that I hadn’t tapped into and as The Wealthy Gardener said, “Do not be intolerant to that which you do not comprehend.” Or Benjamin Franklin’s famous words “The way to see by faith is to shut the eye of reason.” Go for it, you’ll have enough time to think about it later and when obstacles get in the way, just remember Marcus Areulius’ words destined for maxum, “The impedance to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.”

In deciding how to proceed with my running routine, I broke it down as simply as I could. Fortunately, I was coming out of the Lent season and had remained in a spirit of self-reflection, reading, and writing to help me stay in tune with my inner voice. One thing that resonated from my consumption was the principle of effort over results. I realized that I needed to improve effort first, then goal-setting. Reading through an old book, The Wealthy Gardener, I noted a quote that really shaped endurance running, setting goals, and many other things that have a start and a finish; “Impact hours are like cement blocks that form the foundation of all worthy achievements. The impact of a productive life always reflects the impact of its collective hours. We just break the big achievement into smaller pieces and stay consistent in our actions. A plan of action helps us stay the course during the longest journey.”

I thought back to marathon training in the past, doing the long runs and getting the mile reps in. The worst feeling I remember was missing miles or not hitting a long run and not having enough in me to be best prepared for marathon day. It’s not an optimal place to be for a challenge like the marathon. I had too much time ahead of me now and started to think of how I could approach it differently.

So I decided to continue to add miles above the half marathon mark after the NYC United Half. I continued to participate in the virtual marathon for the London marathon through Myway. It was a great challenge and I got 20 miles done on a morning run and then did a 6-mile walk in the evening with my wife, to top it off with Carvel! I began the practice of reflecting on each week and setting a new challenge for the week ahead. I incorporated this into my running and this helped me in a great way to get me to where I am today. I have had more support this training season than ever before and my wife is all to thank! She has been on her own journey of challenging herself. She set a challenge to complete 5 workout days in a week and is determined each week to get it done. She is now at the point where some of her workout days include an Orangetheory class, a 2-3 mile walk/run, and Pilates in one day! Not to mention and since we are in the month of May, she’s in charge of making the lunches for the kids, food shopping, cooking breakfast and dinner, and getting the clothes and the school bags ready. She’s a champion of our house and a real motivator. I am extremely fortunate to have her by my side.

In setting my new weekly challenges, I’ve managed to keep the edge and the burning desire for self-growth lit inside me thanks to the support team that I am fortunate to have. I recently listened to a podcast on The Daily Stoic with guest speaker, Paul Rabil, a legendary lacrosse player who spoke about his challenges of climbing the next mountain once an identity as large as his, is taken away. I had gone through a period of a limiting mindset that is similar to what many athletes may go through. Playing soccer as a young teenager and progressing to higher levels and then onto college really narrowed my identity into being just a ‘soccer player’. Then once that came to a sudden halt, I hit a brick wall and had very little direction due to my ignorance of growth opportunities around while pigeonholing my identity into something that would inevitably end. Things for me got real narrow, real fast and I was in no way prepared for it. A mindset like this might work for someone like Paul Rabil, one of the greatest of all time in his respective sport, and the other 1% or less that get at or near that level. The podcast discussion went on to speak about curiosity and the edge that it gives you in preparing for all potential scenarios. And the darkness that a high achiever can go through when the coin is flipped. It takes tremendous sacrifice and suffering to achieve our highest potential. When we don’t, the skies fall and when we do, it may not be enough or even more challenging to maintain it. This is a reminder of the effort over result mantra.
Benjamin Baruch: “Do not look for approval except for the consciousness of doing your best.”

In consuming all that I had from high achievers, in my readings, and in my new daily habits, I thought more and more about the identity that I was forming. And then a question hit me from one of the greatest sports coaches of all time. How good do you want to be? In Coach Nick Saban’s book, he goes in-depth about the choices we have to be average, good, excellent, or elite at whatever it is that we’re doing. How good do we want to be? Everybody on his staff had two words engraved into their brains “The Process”. Whatever it was that the team was doing on that particular day, they had one job and that was to do it well. Right here, right now. Not thinking about game day, the championships, the crowds. Only The process. My identity has formed my new habits and my habits have formed my new identity. I am a father and a husband working each day to incrementally be the best version of myself. So how good do I want to be? That’s a question that I get to answer every single day and it is answered by the sacred effort that I put into each of my days. Through all of this thought and consumption. I decided to commit to The Process of training and running a qualifying time for the Boston Marathon (BQ) at this year’s Chicago marathon.

To fully engage with my commitment, I put it in ink and signed a contract with a personal running coach! I am a visual learner and when I have a task in front of me that has a start and an end mapped out I am usually more motivated to finish it. I began a formal relationship with the Marathon Training Academy and will work with a coach to have a set training plan to reach my goal of qualifying for Boston! I have communicated my goals to my brain trust and have already received the feedback that I needed to hear. It’s extremely difficult to achieve this goal and borderline crazy. The most motivating words to light my fire!
TWG: “Few of us cannot accept the pain of saying “no” to our dreams, and so we clearly deceive ourselves with the thought of going for it “someday”. Someday is an excuse to avoid the immediate discomfort and anxiety of change.”

One inspiring reason that I chose this challenge was from listening to an episode of the Marathon Training Academy, MTA podcast with one of their coaching clients who gave her testimony to the coaches at MTA for turning her running journey around. Robin Walters was the guest speaker, and she went from barely running half a block to qualifying for the Boston Marathon in less than a year! I learned the simplest piece of advice from that conversation, and I carried it with me the very next day on my run. Make it to the next traffic light, or the next stop sign. Look in front of you and set up mini goals to build up to a great achievement. Believe in The Process! It starts with 1 mile at the pace that I need to get to for a qualifying time and mile by mile up to 27.  

The very next day that I signed on with my new running coach, my sister Cathy reached out inviting me to a mile repeat speed run with the local running club. It was mid-day and I did not expect to go running in the early evening and in my endurance running career am not sure if I ever have! My habits had me in a prepared state. I was drinking close to a gallon of water a day, eating my fruits, protein sources, and my wife’s delicious baked goods. Normally, on a weekday, I would’ve easily turned this down. I remembered to stay in discovery mode! Be open to it and if it works out with my wife and kid’s schedule I would be there to try it out. The run was at a track at the local College of Staten Island so I knew that I could control my distance if I felt overworked. I showed up and a few of the people there I had recognized from previous runs with Staten Island Athletic Club. The weather was incredible for an evening run. During warmups, my sister and I had a great chat that was much appreciated since we don’t run together as much anymore. I expressed to her that I saw the night as a calling since I made my commitment to training for a BQ at our upcoming marathon. I knew that I would have to change my workout routines and do speed runs and interval training, all of which I was completely inexperienced in. My sister did all of it ahead of her NYC marathon and it showed in her results. She reinforced that Boston was a crazy idea. More fuel for the fire!

The gentleman leading the group of runners that night was someone that I remembered from a SIAC long run with him and my sister about a year ago. He was a very forthcoming, friendly, and energetic runner and personality. He went out of his way to speak to my sister ahead of her NYC marathon journey and he had given lessons of what he and his wife learned from their own marathon running. He was also a parent of 2 children with autism. From the first day I met him when he told us that, the lens zoomed way out for any issues that I thought my family and I had. He was even more inspirational in this run as he was running with a fire that I dearly wanted to catch. I learned later that evening that he is also training towards a BQ run in NYC this fall!

Later on, that same week, my wife displayed extraordinary effort in her workouts, setting a new record at Orangetheory! She came in #1 for her age group for the 1-mile benchmark challenge, running an 8:25 pace. Incredible! Her first recognition there was attendance. She did the hardest part and started by showing up. Now she’s discovering how far she can reach and she’s helping me get there as well. Just like I engraved my NYC Marathon medal with, “Together We Can Do Hard Things”. Adriana, Luca, Nicolas. And by the way, she is still baking. Spectacular Mom’s Bakery as our kids title our new bakery!  

Running organized races for the first time is an exciting experience. You’re surrounded by unparalleled energy, logistical masterpieces, heartfelt volunteers, and exclusive access to a part of a city that you would never have otherwise. There was a lot of hype around the Brooklyn Half and I was honored to have the opportunity to meet a part of it alongside 27,000 others! I was able to get in through Team For Kids and we registered our kids for the Stage 1 event at Coney Island. I am so grateful that these organizations acknowledge the importance of children’s participation in events like this and in physical activity. It is through them that my children have had exposure to events that we would have never found on our own.

The week of the Brooklyn half, I began tapering down with my first weekend without a long run and instead did a good tempo run of seven miles at a good pace. I was excited to join another sprint run with the SIAC runners at the track as my last workout before the half. The expo was a great scene in Brooklyn Bridge Park. I had the pleasure of walking over there from my job to enjoy a good shakeout walk the day before. I also had a call scheduled with my running coach from MTA. My BQ training was officially in full effect. The Brooklyn Half would be a good indicator of how realistic my goal was. No pressure! Most importantly, I wanted the Brooklyn Half to be a fun run, especially before the intensity begins. I intend to let it all out while doing my best to avoid injury. I’ve yet to run an organized half marathon or full marathon as loose as this one. Every run is the same in the sense that ‘the hay is in the barn’. You’ve put the time in, the training is done and now you show up and give it your all. To add to the fun, my sister, Cathy does not know that I’ll be joining her for the run and my original plan to surprise her the morning of by picking her up may not work out so I’ll have to come up with something before the week’s end!

Shakeout run. This time around I ran it on my own in an active day prior kicked off with banana-peanut butter bars baked by my wife! I received a text from my sister this morning and that sparked the call to tell her that I’ll be joining her tomorrow. It was uplifting for both of us and we’re looking forward to a fun day with a great weather forecast! We quote our notes from the Daily Stoic podcast to each other often and this mornings was “Just because we despair doesn’t mean we give up. It’s a journey, not a destination.” It was right in line with a blog email that I received about failure. In our moments of failure, we experience the greatest growth opportunities. For tomorrow we will run with self-compassion, not self-assessment! Run for fun and for growth!

I had another motivating call that day, with my new MTA coach, Antonio Gomez. There was a 60-year-old runner who just ran Boston in 3 hours and 16 minutes. Wow! It was our introductory call since I signed up with MTA. He reassured me that we still have time to set the right pace for training without burning out. He also was sure to point out that my training will be intense with the aggressive goal that I have set to qualify for Boston in the upcoming Chicago marathon. We had a great discussion about running during the training plan and how we’ll learn as we go. Although I’ve recorded faster speed runs recently, it is very different than running at that speed for 26.2 miles. Here’s what I took away: “It is not impossible, but it will be intense.” Thank you, Antonio and I’m looking forward to this journey. On that note, I am currently reading Ryan Holiday’s “The Obstacle Is The Way” which there is a story about a baseball player, Tommy John. Tommy John is a world-renowned term in baseball for a surgery that pitchers get when they throw their arm out. The surgery takes a ligament from their non-throwing arm and inserts it into their throwing arm so they can continue to play. Tommy John played for 26 seasons in Major League Baseball. An extraordinary feat. He got really good at asking himself and others, in various forms, one question over and over again: Is there a chance? Do I have a shot? Is there something I can do? All he ever looked for was a yes, no matter how slight or tentative, or provisional the chance. If there was a chance, he was ready to take it and make good use of it - ready to give every ounce of effort and energy he had to make it happen.

Race day! Although not having the best pre-race meal the night prior, I was able to get my body on the right path with morning yoga, protein and carb intake, hydration, and AG1 before heading out the door. I had a pleasant surprise, thanks to my sister, the collaborator, driving in with a fellow runner from Staten Island. He has just completed the London Marathon and is an experienced outdoor athlete. We enjoyed good conversations about running and family on our drive in and we wound up crossing over the start line together in stride. When I was running with him for the first 1 mile plus, I was way closer to the pace that I needed to start at than in other races. In our corral, there was a sea of people which really brought the reputation of the race to life. Standing right outside the majestic Brooklyn Museum building in good weather was the reason why I and 27,000 others have been up since 5 AM that morning and training all winter, to get to this point!

Running down Flatbush past the Prospect Park Zoo and then into Prospect Park resembled much of the start of the NYC United Half. This is a very crowded part of the race and it was a much better experience having a partner with me. I began to hop into my A-skips and butt kicks since we were stuck at this pace! Shout out to the SIAC leader, Ryan, and the speed runs for showing me some warmups that I could put to good use! The weather got hot and sunny quickly. I had my energy balls with me which have been effective in my long run training and at mile 3 I stopped in the park to use the bathroom and had one. As I approached the hills in the park, I began to pick up the pace and from that point on committed to giving my all every step of the way, not holding anything back. I came out of the park at personal record paces for a half marathon and then shattered them running down Ocean Parkway in strides like I never had put together before in a half.

I pushed every ounce of glucose in me, every stride, every muscle form in my run for every step that I possibly could. I saw Coney Island in the distance and at Mile 11, I had to pull over for a water break. To that point, I was able to run right by several fluid stations down Ocean Parkway. I had 1:30 in my head, and without doing any calculations from my watch, I just forged on forward. I certainly felt a difference in my pace as I came into Coney Island. Still pushing as hard as I could, I was not at the pace that I was at a mile or two ago and I knew it. Another area that I will have to improve on immensely, is negative splits.

The finish line down the Coney Island boardwalk created a sense of awesomeness that every runner can relate to when seeing a finish line after a run of sacred effort. The post-race scene was certainly the best that I have ever seen. They had the entire Cyclone Stadium open to the public for a post-race party. I skipped right past that and walked out to Neptune Ave. to meet my wife who drove in with the kids so that I could get them over to their Stage 1 race. My wife, nothing short of amazing for getting the kids there in absolute chaos for drivers in the Coney Island area that day. After I got them, I put another 1-mile run in and credit to Luca and Valentina who ran right alongside me so that we could make their race! And we did. Nicolas took the stroller way there.

This race might have been harder to navigate than Rome, Italy. Cell phone service was down. My wife could not meet us until about an hour later and had to park almost a mile away. At last, we all met inside Cyclone Stadium and enjoyed some Nathan’s Hotdog treats. It was a personal record for me and it was another memorable day for my family with an experience that we’ll always remember. We are grateful to be runners and my wife included as she prepares for her first 5K run next week on Memorial Day!

We were all winners on Memorial Day, even Nicolas took home a prize!

Lessons Learned:

Marcus Aurelius: ‘The impedance to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.’ Always look to turn obstacles into advantages.

Benjamin Baruch: “Do not look for approval except for the consciousness of doing your best.”

Tony Robbins: “When would now be a good time?” When a goal is in front of you, now is always the right time.

Jeff Bezos: “I knew that if I failed I wouldn’t regret that. But I knew the one thing I might regret is not having ever tried.”

The Daily Stoic: “Just because we despair doesn’t mean we give up. It’s a journey, not a destination.”

Meditations by Marcus Aurelius: “Good luck and fortune is a matter of probability that can be increased though not guaranteed by the right decisions and the right preparation.”

The Wealthy Gardener: “In our decisions, we have the power over the future. We hold the reins of our fate. We are in charge, at least before our choices & conditions gain the upper hand and then control us.”